Why trauma therapy?
1. You have erased yourself
In a toxic relationship, you learn to suppress yourself to avoid conflicts. You lose the connection with who you are.
2. You recognize your own mechanisms
Common patterns in male victims:
- High empathy — you understand her pain, you excuse her behavior
- Caretaking — you take responsibility for the well-being of others
- Low self-esteem — you believed what she said about you
- Avoidant attachment pattern — you learned that showing emotions is dangerous
3. You avoid the same mistake
Without insight into your patterns, you risk being attracted to the same dynamic again.
4. You learn to choose for yourself
The ultimate goal: not away from her, but toward yourself.
Which form of therapy?
| Form | What it does | Good for |
|---|---|---|
| EMDR | Processes traumatic memories | PTSD, flashbacks, anxiety |
| EFT | Explores emotions and attachment patterns | Understanding yourself in relationships |
| Schema therapy | Deep beliefs from childhood | Rigid self-images |
| Systemic therapy | Patterns in a broader context | Recognizing and breaking patterns |
| CBT | Thought patterns | Depression, anxiety |
| Peer support group | Connection with like-minded individuals | Breaking shame, recognition |
Look for a therapist experienced in trauma AND intimate partner violence. Ask explicitly whether they have experience with male victims.
Reimbursement: via a referral from your GP to a contracted psychologist, partial reimbursement is possible in Belgium.